Mighty Morphin Power Rangers: Season 1

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*note: the rating below applies to the entire season thus far, and will only be adjusted later if I feel the later episodes sink the show further down or improve its' curb upward at all.

Episode #1: "Day of the Dumpster"

Plot:
Jason is the instructor of a popular karate class at The Juice Bar and Billy is excited to enroll but lacks confidence and is quick to doubt his skills. Meanwhile, Bulk and Skull harrass Trini and Kimberly because the girls won't go on a double date with them. After Kimberly suggests they join Jason's class, they come barging in and Bulk demands to be shown "how to beat people up." Suddenly, there's a huge earthquake: it's Rita! She's attacking the city! It's time for Zordon and Alpha-Five to call upon the services of 5 "overbearing and overemotional humans," aka- teenagers, to stop her awesome force. And with that- Jason, Trini, Billy, Kimberly, and their friend Zack all teleport to their Command Center to become the Power Rangers. At first, the gang are reluctant to accept their new powers but, when they try to leave, they are attacked by Rita Repulsa's putty patrolers and decide to try out their cool power morphers. They are so successful that Rita decides to up the stakes by sending her #1 henchman, Goldar, to finish them off- unleashing her greatest power: to make her monsters grow to giant-size. This means they now have to call upon their Dino-Zords to battle him off and form the awesome Megazord.

This show is terrible. But I am - and always have been - utterly in awe of it. I mean, superhero movies and shows (and hopefully their comic book ancestors) rely on something more substantial than good-looking protagonists, cool-looking costumes, a killer theme song, and a kick-ass arsenal of weapons and rides. Power Rangers is less than a mixed-bag. It has a great looking cast but their characters are so preposterously written and fantastically annoying (especially in the case of Amy Jo Johnson's Kimberly, who's such an obnoxious and enthusiastically loud Buffy clone) that you won't really like them except as great looking cast members. The suited-up fighting scenes and Zord action come by way of stretches of repetition so incredibly long that it's clear every episode which follows continues to use them unedited (especially in the case of the formation of the Megazord) as a way to fill the neat 20-minute running time. The look of the weapons and costumes, as well as the music, fare better and remain undeniably cool. The suits have a beautiful shiny metallic quality to them, flying colors and beams of laser-esque light will always be awesome, and the Megazord just rules. We have to wait until later to see what that sword can do but, for a few moments, it'll be worth sitting through the awful storylines to get to.

Which reminds me- Rita's kept quieter in this episode than in episodes to come. We're also, of course, introduced to Bulk and Skull here- an area of the show's formula that begs me to bring up the unused pilot episode but I went on enough about that in the appropriate thread. The Bulk and Skull here couldn't be lamer. When Bulk says "teach us how to beat people up!!" ... How; he didn't already know? A bully who lunges out at people and, he was never successful in grabbing anyone? And, why would he say that in front of a crowd of people, moreover- a crowd who are all being taught karate? They could beat him up. But what makes me scratch my head until it bleeds a little is just the out loud part. Who would ever say that? What on Earth could he have possibly believed Jason would say in response? Throughout the series, he and Skull always call him and the rest of the Rangers "goody-goodies" and "dorks." Did he think the way he phrased his request would appeal to Jason's non-existent dark side? What motivation would even a jerk-Jason have to teach Bulk anything about karate? There are so many things wrong with it that it demands analysis and warrants a potential ban on this writer working for the show.

It's legitimately the show's first (of many) Super-WTF?!'s. Proving that the show's creators either we're trying to dumb down the intended audience of kids or they literally had no clue what they were doing- the latter theory is not supported by the original pilot, which is actually quite good. This debut episode feels like it was scripted on a whole other planet, rather than just shot there. This only helps occasionally, when there's a laugh to be had at the fact that this is truly the Saved by the Bell of the superhero genre. Usually, however, it's just puzzling. Its' story sensibilities are bad-tv classics but the whole look and feel of its' fictional Angel Grove setting is so cheap and otherworldly, you'd wonder how this ever caught on. It's downright obscure and bizarrely unfamiliar. Where in the hell did they even film this? Maybe the show hypnotized people into watching with all these mysteries. I mean, I'm still here. All these years later.

★½

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Episode #2: "High Five"

Plot:
Trini reveals her paralyzing fear of heights to the other Rangers at The Youth Center Juice Bar when she sees Jason climbing the rope. Later, Billy is able to create communicator wrist-watches for the Rangers. Meanwhile, Rita Repulsa is hatching a plan to build an evil time device that will wreak havoc in the city and trap the Rangers in an alternate dimension where they will be destroyed so she can conquer Earth. She's also getting her minion chef Finster to cook her up a monster to distract the Rangers should the plan not go well. At the Command Center, the Rangers are alerted to the disturbance and dispatched to handle a group of putty patrolers being mischevous in the desert-like outlands of the city. Their mission includes not morphing but instead fighting the putties without their powers. But this is very difficult, especially for Billy who lacks martial arts skills and Trini who has to face her greatest fear to rescue Billy when everyone splits up and he runs up the very high hill to avoid an attack. They defeat the putties but Bones arrives and sucks them into a time warp where they have to contend with him, skull warriors, and Rita's other minions - Squat and Baboo - who are planting a bomb. And that's not all! Even if they manage to destroy Bones, Rita has another rotten trick up her sleeve.

Pity poor David Yost as Billy the Blue Ranger. This episode really turns him into a damsel in distress and the weak link of the group. He is apparently deaf and can't hear Trini yelling at him in the valley of a mountain (which would surely amplify her already high-pitched voice), he whines in several scenes (one of which is spent between the thick, beefy thighs of Austin St. John, the ultra-hunky Red Ranger), and is such a wimp that he fumbles his morpher out of his hands and has to be rescued by a girl. I'm sure several kids (not me, however) were thinking Billy sucks. Probably why in all the games he was made clumsy, slow, and dressed shabbily. I always thought his portrayal in the games was unfair but this episode is just as damaging. Trini doesn't come off much better as she runs and hides- unable to fight off two measely putties. This dynamic of course changes over the course of the show. And actually, Trini was shown as much bolder in the first episode. Though we're talking about the putties here. Indeed a force to be reckoned with- they wear tight gray outfits that accentuate their big bulges and ample butts while they bounce around in kidlike fashion, acting like retarded gymnasts. However, the pair completely redeem themselves in Ranger form when together they single-handedly destroy Bones. And without the aid of their weapons or Zords. Is this episode an improvement over the first? Not really. Although, props go to the incorporation of the first in Rita's long line of cool monsters. And not just one either. No power sword action yet though. Bummer.

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Episode #3: "Teamwork"

Plot:
Trini and Kimberly are leading a campaign to close down the local toxic dumping site citing high levels of pollution, etc. They try to get the guys to help out but it seems all of them have prior commitments, which disappoints the girls greatly. After getting the designated number of signatures, they head off to the dumping site to deliver their petition but are unsettled to find no one anywhere in sight. No one works there? Apparently not. But that doesn't mean the girls are alone. It so happens Rita is using the dumpsite as her latest scheme to destroy Angel Grove. And Trini and Kimberly have fallen right into her trap. She sends down a storm of putties to attack them. When the guys try to come to their aid, Rita sends a monster to distract them. Eventually, the Rangers get together to fight the Minotaur monster but, no matter what they do, he's just too strong. Zordon decides to introduce to them a new pool of weapons to fight the monster.

Okay... I don't want to say anything crazy like this show is finally getting its' foot into a groove that works (I've seen the reruns enough times to know it didn't get that much better from here). But this happens to be a surprisingly entertaining episode, far better than the previous two. For one, it's covered very well. I'm talking mostly about reaction shots, point of view, and editing- they're all greatly improved and (... dare I say) effective this time around. Secondly, the action against the monster in particular is a lot more thorough and detailed than the show usually delivers. More actually happens than I remember in other episodes. And it happens faster, making you almost feel like a real battle is taking place. And... well, Rita is a lot more involved this time. Or, should I say- finally involved at all? She seems to be watching with a closer eye while the monster is fighting and reacts before it's destroyed. You even start to wonder if maybe she has a character after all. Lastly, the Rangers actually kind of feel heroic here. When they get their new weapons, they seemed to get stronger and for once, it didn't seem as though they were just spouting empty drivel about how cool this is. They finally seem to be carrying an attitude of: don't push us around or we'll demolish you. It may be talk but at least the talk is tougher this time, suggesting the Rangers have been personally affected in the battle somehow.

In this episode, we meet the Rangers' school principal, Mr. Caplan, who is a total douchebag. GOD, this guy is annoying! And stupid, too. In the show's storylines, he typically serves as an obstacle to slow them down. For example, even though the Rangers are such upstanding, straight-A, honor role students, he always blames every single thing that goes wrong or someone else does ON THEM! Even when there are witnesses who watched Bulk & Skull do it, he refuses to see the light. This episode has perhaps his greatest WTF?! moment- and it isn't even him being the disciplinarian- it's him being incredibly stupid. He actually questions the girls: "is this dumpsite really as bad as you say?" In full arms-crossed, skeptical facial expression, concerned tone mode. They answer back with a zippy, "like, who could stand to pollute the Earth like that?" And when we cut back to him, he has the face you see above. Like he didn't just ask a question at all; very "You don't say." More Bulk & Skull calamity, as it's worked into the plot that they like to make a mess in the hallway as a form of protest (in their case, they would be protesting against being good). And they have a new friend with them- whom I believe we only see in a total of 2 episodes, playing a long-haired femme-looking grunge-rocker type. I wouldn't exactly call them finessed or nuanced yet but there's definitely an improvement in their characters in this episode. In fact, during their confrontations with the Rangers out-of-uniform here, I actually felt like rooting for the "bad guys."

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Episode #4: "A Pressing Engagement"

Plot:
Jason's trying to break The Youth Center's current benchpressing record of 1,009, shockingly held by Bulk, and is getting really discouraged as various distractions keep throwing him off from reaching 1,010. Rita sees this and decides the key to beating the Power Rangers is to separate Jason from the others and destroy him. While she hatches a plan to trap him in a battle with Goldar and Finster's new monster, King Sphinx, Bulk and Skull taunt Jason about even trying to break the record. Zordon contacts Jason, Zack, and Kimberly to tell them Rita's sent Sphinx, the putties, and Squat and Baboo to attack an outdoor theater. During the battle, the Sphinx transports him to a rocky desertscape where the monster and Goldar double-team him. Back at the Command Center, Zordon gives the Rangers yet another new tool to help them in this time of need: Power Crystals. This will allow them to break through any force keeping them away from Jason.

This time, rather than regulating the pacing of the battle, the show tries to increase the stakes by blowing up the proportions of everything. The result is that now everything feels as weighted and clunky as the monsters look. The Bulk and Skull stuff is getting really old, and I fear (because I know what lies ahead) the show doesn't know that they aren't the slightest bit amusing anymore (yes, I thought they were a tiny bit enjoyable in episode 3). This episode shows that even their musical theme can't stretch that far. As for the Rangers, this episode tends to be highlighted more by their lingo ("it's casual," "wipeout!" - little TMNT'y, don't ya think?) and bubble-blowing / skate-boarding antics than by their stories. This should present a comfortable balance, and on a better show it just might have. But, watching Austin St. John being bearhugged by a guy like Paul Schrier and Amy Jo Johnson's extended gymnastic routine, it becomes clear that this series is a showcase for the "Special Skills" section on their resumes. Hope for their sake they all moved on to better things. More cliches and stereotypes ahoy: Ernie's given a name and more character... yeah, he sits around and eats while Jason works out and has the wherewithal to get 5 healthy kids a giant cake. Guess what? Bulk and Ernie are the only ones genuinely interested in it. Oh, and, this show has a real thing against cake. Whenever you see one in any episode, know that it will end up on someone's face or on the floor.

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Episode #5: "Different Drum"

Plot:
Kimberly is the instructor of a popular dance steps course at The Youth Center and Billy wants to take it but he just can't dance. Whenever he tries, he trips and falls all over the place and is embarrassed to do this in front of Kimberly's female students. Rita watches this and gets the idea to use music against the Rangers. She plots to make a monster called The Gnarly Gnome that will hypnotize the Rangers into a haze, allowing her to destroy them. Back in Kimberly's class- minor tensions arise when Melissa, who is deaf, tries to dance with the students and bumps into another girl, and when Zack shows off some of his moves, Bulk uses it to taunt Jason but Zack serves him royally. The monster waits outside The Juice Bar for the Rangers and decides to warm up his magical accordian by practicing on a group of Kimberly's students. The monster lures them off into a cave and holds them hostage, but luckily Melissa can't hear the music and is able to rush back to tell Jason what's going on.

Dear me, I seem to have made a mistake: Bulk and Skull aren't the cause of any kind of problem on the show- they're merely a bi-product. I should have known in episode 2 after Alpha-Five went into some freakish kind of spin-dash-waddle-jerk-sugar rush breakdown that it wasn't an isolated incident. Here, Billy is just a ridiculous source of physical humor. And when I say "humor," I'm straining so much I fear I'll pull something. It's also worth noting there are more WTF?'s here, especially during the fight scenes. When the Rangers use their power weapons, it seems they've changed the names of them and you can't hear what they're saying anyway ("mighty maze"? "Cosmic cannon"? "Diver daggers"?). Also, Kimberly's grey rather than pink several times. Added bonus, though: finally we see the Power Sword in all its' glory. King Sphinx was vanquished by the sword in episode 4 but this is the first episode to have the full effect with red clouded lightning warmup and star-field strike shots.

Overall, however, I have to point to this episode as being one of the better so far. When Finster says that "musical monsters aren't very reliable," it turns out the writer of this episode decided she wanted that line to have some actual resonance. Instead of just being said and dropped soon after, it's a set-up to show this particular monster as being pretty darn lazy. Which of course suits the image of a gnome in viking getup. Also, this episode has one of my favorite lines from the show. As the monster sits and pigs out, playing his music, he makes the kidnapped girls dance in a circle and tells the putties to join them. The image alone of the putties dancing is a natural, but he has to say this (and it's the closest thing to a howler this show's ever gonna get): "You're dancing with putties now, but soon you'll be dancing with Power Rangers," capped off with a hysterically evil guffaw. Meanwhile, Baboo turns into the guy's personal chef and lets us in on his secret ingredient: multi-colored rubber toy balls. Seriously, this episode gets major points for outrageousness.

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Episode #6: "Food Fight"

Plot:
As part of a school project, the Rangers and their principal Mr. Caplan are organizing a Food Fair at the Youth Center to benefit a children's charity for playground equipment. Things are going well until Bulk and Skull's gang starts throwing things and a huge food fight breaks out. Meanwhile, Rita's sick and planned to take the day off until she catches Squat and Baboo spying through her telescope at the food fight. She's so enraged that she commands her minions to destroy all the food on Earth, so Finster creates the Pudgy Pig monster who lands in Angel Grove and begins eating everything in sight. The Rangers are called to morph into action and find the pig is quite a handful due to the fact that he'll literally eats anything- including their weapons!

And the WTF?'s just keep on rolling. For some reason, this show's version of the Food Fair includes a pair of Hawaiian dancers in trashy outfits just hanging around, serving no function except to flirt with Ernie. HUH? Where's Dana from Step by Step when you need her? Of course, the most unbelievable thing about the episode is the Pudgy Pig monster itself. Previously, the monsters in these goofy costumes weren't really supposed to do anything believably- so they always shot beams out of their eyes and horns or carried a weapon. This pig monster is meant to have a mouth that he consumes food in, but there's nobody in the world who's going to believe this pig is eating anything. So, really, his evil specialty is that he basically just picks food up and dumps it on the ground. Which is actually a lot more amusing than the idea that he eats it all. Shots of it trying to eat food already on the ground are especially bizarre. Similar face-palm inducers include Bulk sliding over a row of tables covered with bowls and fruit (which are not slippery enough to propel a human body of any size) and, of course, a typical Mr.-Caplan-blames-everyone-except-the-people-responsible moment.

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Episode #7: "Big Sisters"

Plot:
Kimberly and Trini have volunteered to join a Big Sisters program and mentor a little girl named Maria who's a bit of a troublemaker. Meanwhile, Rita is fuming mad at not being able to destroy the Power Rangers and has decided she needs more evil- so, she intends to locate and activate something called the Power Eggs. Which are supposed to have so much force, that no one can stop it. However, upon trying to open the ancient box they come in, Rita realizes only a child can. So, now she schemes to kidnap Maria and make her do it. As usual, for insurance- she has Finster make her a monster that will guard Maria and battle the Rangers should they interfere. While on a picnic, the putties swoop down and take Maria away, and Kimberly and Trini run to tell the others. But there's a problem. Their communicators aren't working and they can't teleport to the Command Center. So it's up to Billy to get them there and he introduces them to his newest invention: The Rad Bug. A space-traveling car.

This episode serves to further the show's inspirational / positive role model agenda and, like most morally clean television programming, it feels wooden and ineffective at presenting any kind of compelling storyline, believable characters, or spirit-lifting humor. Maria has nothing interesting going on and, well, when that little girl from Problem Child 2 is more memorable- you know they've failed. One moment of noteworthy clever (and it's a good'un): when the chicken monster shows up, the music score actually starts playing a twisted guitar version of "Old MacDonald Had a Farm." Rita also has a hilarious Wicked Witch of the West moment: she flies through the air on one of those weird, old-time bikes with the huge front wheel.

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Episode #8: "I, Eye Guy"

Plot:
When Billy trains a young protege Willy to invent a really cool virtual reality device for his class's science fair, Rita decides she wants to kidnap the boy and steal his intelligence for herself. On the way to the fair, the Rangers are attacked by putties who are unsuccessful in taking the boy. At the fair, Bulk and Skull show up to insult the "nerds" and cause trouble. However, when they make a ruckus, the Professor judging the competition disqualifies Willy even though he had absolutely nothing to do with the scuffle. He runs away and when he's alone, Rita's new monster Eye Guy kidnaps him and holds him in an alternate dimension. The Rangers find his lucky cap but no trace of him. They teleport to the Command Center where Zordon informs them of the situation. To rescue Willy, they must destroy the "main eye" of the monster- which can detach itself from the body and float around on its' own.

Well, finally it's time to give Billy some fighting points- he definitely holds his own with the other Rangers in a group battle against the putties. As for the episode, however... wow. You might be thinking that they realized what a good thing they had with episode 3 and were trying to replicate it. Oh, sure, this episode has Billy at his most dramatic. But there are multiple types of drama- empty and somewhat full. This is completely empty. The rest of the episode's offerings are threadbare WTF?'s. A cross-dressing scene (why? ...just, why?). Next, Rita's motivation for her plan is beyond stupid. Then... this monster can shoot animated, pac-man eyeballs out of his breasts. Yes, you heard that correctly. And, well my face is a little red right now. I thought Mr. Caplan was the only asshole who always blamed the "good guys" for the actions of Bulk and Skull and their "bad" friends. Turns out it's all adult authority figures (this show may hate cake but it doesn't seem to like most adults all that much either). Of course, this guy gets a tiny bit of credit for being less hot-headed than Caplan and in the end, he apologizes to the person he wronged without being coerced. I may have given prior episodes a few points for outrageousness but there's a fine line between truly outrageous and just plain stupid. Episode 5 was outrageous. This episode is just stupid.

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Episode #9: "For Whom the Bell Trolls"

Plot:
It's Hobby Week at the Rangers' school and everyone's getting ready to show the other students their unique talents and interests. When it's Trini's turn, she shows the class her collection of dolls from around the world. This makes Rita jealous and so she decides to steal her favorite doll, Mr. Ticklesneezer, for an evil plan in which she transforms him into a monster and uses his magical bottle to capture anything she wants- including the Power Rangers. However, when he becomes a monster, he isn't mean and doesn't want to do anything hurtful. This infuriates her and she bullies him, sending him to Earth as he starts collecting everything in sight. Even, by accident, Trini and Billy. Now the other Rangers must save them and stop Rita and Ticklesneezer with a team of only 3.

This episode has rendered me speechless. I've got nothing. There isn't a single moment that left me so appalled or confused that I rushed to my Notepad file to type down my observations. Nor was there anything that necessarily left me impressed. It isn't overwhelmingly good and it isn't boring either. If you only see a handful of episodes (which I would suggest), I would make this one of them. Maybe you'll have a reaction to it. Between episodes 8 and 9, I think I got lost somewhere in Austin St. John's bulging muscles (which I generously snagged a pic for y'all to see above) and glorious sculpted butt (I'm currently in the process of mounting a Facebook album dedicated just to how hot he was).

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Episode #10: "Happy Birthday, Zack"

Plot:
Ernie has been keeping The Youth Center open late nights so the Rangers can prepare for a huge party they're throwing on Zack's Birthday. As a result, though, everyone's so busy now that they have no time for him. Instead of making him suspicious, this makes him depressed. When his Birthday finally comes, as part of the surprise- the Rangers pretend they've forgotten so he'll flip when he arrives at the party but this just bums him out and makes him think his friends are inconsiderate. Rita is also planning something special for the occasion: a monster Finster believes will wipe him out for good. Zack goes to the outer edge of the city and sulks when Rita and her minions show up and attack him. The other Rangers are alerted to his situation and run to help him.

Well, I think the show finally has found a groove and nested there. It's a fairly mundane one, but at least it's becoming consistent. The teens are kinda lame but attractive, they're busy but they're working it out, Bulk and Skull show up and try to cause trouble but - like everything else - they can handle it, minor conflict arises and it's settled into the dust before the fight's even finished. Rita babbles, minions cower and shudder, bad plan, monster, fight scene, "I've got such a headache!" Oh, and there's a cake in this episode. This will not end well. And a bizarre finisher to the monster. Apparently, the Megazord has this incredible ability to suck the power out of adversaries and freeze their weapons. Um... they never did this before or since? Why? One thought has occured to me, though- we see frequently that they've discarded or dropped weapons and important tools and they just have them again later... where do they go? They don't have any place to stash them- do they just toss them into the air and they disappear until the Rangers call "upon" them again?

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Episode #11: "No Clowning Around"

Plot:
The Rangers and Trini's young cousin Sylvia intend to spend a fun-filled day at the fair, not knowing that Rita's planned an elaborate trap for them. From the moment they arrive, the putties are already disguised as employees of the fair. The Rangers walk around the grounds looking at all the performers but Sylvia wants to hang out with the demented clown, Pineapple. She separates from Trini and the others and when Trini rushes to find her, Pineapple turns her into a cardboard cut-out. This tells the Rangers the entire fair is a trap. Now they have to warn everyone to get to safety, foil Rita's plan, and save poor Sylvia.

Oh... my... GOD! The bad, bad acting, coming from this guy playing the evil clown. I'm paralyzed: I don't know whether this is a bad performance masterpiece (in the Troll 2 vein) or just so-bad-it-hurts. Or... can it be both? Anyway, this is [cue bad segue into discussion of this jaw-dropping monster] a wonderfully fruity episode which you can clearly tell from the various implications in the plot description. It won't likely traumatize any of us since I'm betting most of us have seen both IT and Killer Klowns from Outer Space. But, if you hadn't seen these, there are images in this episode that would haunt you forever. And no, I'm not talking about the shockingly underplayed suggestion of child abduction / molestation (or the child's blatant desire to go off and be alone with her would-be captor); seriously- I'm surprised this episode wasn't followed by one of those public service announcement type spots they used to run on Fox Kids before and after the show (if you look, you might find some of them on YouTube) about going away with and trusting strangers. I assume they thought they were getting their hands out of the cookie jar by also having Billy inexplicably mesmerized by the freaky performance-artist clown as well.

Instead of a bad message, though, I would indict the episode for just not trying to make it a message at all. Instead, we sitting watching this will be inventing scenarios that the show didn't have the guts to even warn people against. No, what's likely to haunt you are the putties with clown garb on; AHH! Or, how ridiculous and unbelievable it is that Jason is able to clear the entire fair by just saying "Rita's attacking the park" on a bullhorn. Never before have I wanted to see a group of people "in danger" stomped on so much in my movie-watching life. Could you imagine the image of a giant foot covered with the bloody body goo from like 3 dozen people smeared on it? Maybe that will be what haunts you (if not, just read a plot description for Clive Barker's story In the Hills, the Cities). And, the monster loves to go off on semi-hilarious "I am the mighty / I will take over the world" type of self-aggrandizing rants. What makes it funny is his dang voice. Imagine if Cookie Monster had a cold that made his voice even more gravelly and a fever that went to his head, making him delirious, and he dressed up like a giant rotten pineapple and tried to spook everyone on Sesame Street. See what I mean?

Whether this episode deserves to have points added or subtracted for its' insane ideas is up to you. It's far better (more entertaining) than episode 8 but not quite as eyebrow-inducing as episode 5. Well... in concept perhaps, but not execution. Oh, it has the stuff to be but - somehow - watching Thuy Trang take this so seriously and the show actually have the brains to draw out her "suspenseful" hunt for missing Sylvia with an excellent music cue and shots of her running, looking ultra-concerned (the show's way of actually recognizing the kind of situation the girl is actually in), just removes the laugh potential from the scene. It's also great to spend an entire episode outdoors for once. I found all the carnival rides to be a great distraction from the always dull Rangers (out of uniform).

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Episode #12: "Power Ranger Punks"

Plot:
The Rangers are taking some time for themselves, enjoying a friendly game of volleyball when the putty patrolers show up to dampen their day. While the Rangers fight them off, they don't notice Baboo behind the picnic table spiking their drinks with something he calls a "punk potion." After the putties run away, Billy and Kimberly drink the potion and turn into punks- being rude to the other Rangers. The next day at school, they've completely transformed into bullies. This of course really worries the other Rangers. At the Command Center, Zordon tells them about a plant called the Singing Squash that they can use to turn the Rangers back to normal. Unfortunately, Rita's made a monster to throw a wrench in this plan and the 3 good Rangers must go off and fight him alone. Until Alpha and Zordon can fix Billy and Kimberly.

Did you ever think David Yost's Billy made an unconvincing hero? Well, you haven't seen anything yet. Wait 'til you see him as a villain! I made it through the clown in episode 11, but... this performance is literally so bad it hurts. It hurts A LOT. I can't even go into details, I can feel the pain returning. Amy Jo Johnson fares slightly better because we already know her as someone who has to have an attitude at times, disses Bulk and Skull with often twisted facial expressions, and... she has makeup. Here, well, she rather bares a frightening resemblance to Class of Nuke 'Em High's Taru. Yeah, the bi-sexual leather dominatrix. Only with Egyptian farrows on the sides of her eyes and an electro-fried hairdo. More interesting, however, is that when she turns punk she gets very submissive. I almost jumped when I saw Billy grab her by the neck and practically drag her away. Later, she flirts with Jason Narvy's Skull and even then she lets him be in control to a certain degree. I guess that's supposed to make her the M to Billy's S. Which almost makes me desperately want to see what the other Rangers would be like had they drank the potion.

Also, I can't help but make a big deal out a detail like this, but: during the volleyball game... Kimberly brings drinks. They're drinks. Drinks. Billy exclaims, "boy, those drinks look good." That's the same thing as someone labeling their lunch, snacks, or unidentified edible thing they have in their hands "eats." What kind of "drinks" are they? The world...may never know. If it's water, why not just say it's water? It's too clear to be Gatorade. I don't think it's soda- although it almost seems to have bubbles. And, finally, why not leave it in the can? Or, can't this show afford a fake 7UP knockoff called Soda or something? Anyway, this episode is very bad for most of the running time. But, I have to give it begrudging credit: when the Blue and Pink Rangers finally show, this turns out to be one of the show's best fight scenes up to this point. There's even some excellent Evil Dead-inspired camerawork that really livens things up. The energy level is high and the editing is sharp. And I love the part where the Terror Toad monster is smacked up against a tree.

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Episode #13: "Peace, Love, and Woe"

Plot:
The Youth Center is having a big dance and Billy is just too busy working on the experiments in his lab to bother with all that. Suddenly, he meets a girl, Marge, who is perfect for him. She even speaks the exact same technical-term lingo as him. Meanwhile, Rita is steamed over the recent losses at the hands of the Rangers and wants to procure the services of an even more powerful monster than ever before. She calls upon an old friend, Madam Woe, to wreak havoc and destroy the Rangers. Rita tells her to swoop down and capture the Ranger who will be in the park at 4 o'clock- where Billy will meet Marge. She does, unfortunately- she catches Marge instead of Billy. Billy shows up looking for Marge and is attacked by the putties. At the Command Center, the Rangers are informed that Madam Woe is so powerful, that they will need a special plan of attack to beat her. By combining the 5 power coins in the center of their morphers, one of the 5 Rangers will be made as powerful as all together. And the chosen one will take her on alone.

The obvious problem with an episode like this is that they just had to set Billy up with a storyline like: he doesn't really want to meet girls and even when he does meet one who is made to be interested in him, he outright refuses to ask her out. Now, the show is forcing him to find a female soulmate. Yet, by this episode both Jason and Zack are without love interests- to say nothing of the girls. Angela and Tommy haven't been introduced as characters yet, and even when they are- both Trini and Jason go without love interests forever (which would have made them ideal matches for one another, don't ya think?). More points detracted from Billy's hero counter: he isn't able to even hit 1 single putty while alone. However, points do go to the Blue Ranger's protracted and tough fight scene against Madam Woe. Even with the powers of his fellow Rangers combined- she still kicks the snot out of him for the longest time. Also: more cake, people- a lot more. You know what that means.

[nopersonality]

Episode #14: "Foul Play in the Sky"

Plot:
Kimberly is visiting her Uncle Steve who's a pilot and is going flying with him on his plane. Unfortunately, the day is spoiled when Bulk and Skull show up and Uncle Steve invites them to come along. Rita is watching this and decides this is the perfect opportunity to finish off the Pink Ranger, so she sends Squat to put a sleeping potion in Steve's drink. Meanwhile, back at The Youth Center, Zack is lovestruck by a girl named Angela who always shoots him down when he asks her out. Up in the plane, Steve falls asleep and Bulk and Skull start screaming. Rita sends down her latest monster to destroy the other Rangers while Kimberly gets advice on how to land the plane from Alpha. Hopefully, none of the plane's passengers will find out she's a Power Ranger.

What are the odds that the show will try and sell off another one of its' characters to love the episode right after Billy gets a girlfriend? Well, this one's a twofer. You might not remember that Kimberly courts a guy with her "you landed the plane all by yourself and saved 3 peoples' lives" glory. His name was Matt. And, like Marge in the last episode, you will never see this guy again. As for Zack's would-be girlfriend, Angela, no such luck. She becomes a recurring character. With nothing going on but- Zack really wants to date her, she's relentlessly high-maintenance and snobby. Oh, and she's ugly too. I feel less guilty about saying that since they make her such a damn bitch on wheels over the course of her handful of episodes.

[nopersonality]

Episode #15: "Dark Warrior"

Plot:
Trini's Uncle Howard, a famous scientist working on a ground-breaking invisibility formula, is coming to Angel Grove and Trini's excited. She goes to tell Billy, who of course is a science whiz himself, but he's already bummed out when Bulk and Skull bully him to steal change for the video game machine. He decides to re-enroll in Jason's karate class while also taking side lessons from Uncle Howard who happens to be a world famous martial arts master. However, the putties kidnap him and take him to Rita's newest monster. Together, they plan to steal his invisibility formula which Trini doesn't know about. They send her a note demanding she gives them the formula or they will set off a bomb in the cave where he's being held captive. Unfortunately for everyone, Uncle Howard brought the jar with the formula in it to The Youth Center and forgot it there. The Rangers spring into action to find the cave, fighting through an army of putties. During this battle, Billy begins to use his teachings and finds strength he never knew he had.

Another rare episode without a single WTF? It's not necessarily memorable in any way. In fact, I can barely remember what I just saw and I finished watching the episode 10 minutes ago. Billy and Trini's stories don't go very far. So their existence is incidental. Except possibly to explain why Billy might kick more ass in episodes to come. It's about time. Everyone else fades into the background and come in about even. Except for Bulk and Skull, no one else has any gags (though Ernie has a recurring bit where he carries jars and jugs on and off of the counter, coming across the invisibility formula several times). And Trini's Uncle Howard, like her cousin Sylvia, will never be seen on the show again. Hello... Goodbye...